A civil case

We’ve got a little bit of news to share with you and it’s with a very emotional heart that we have decided to share this with you.

Following Millie’s Inquest ending in December 2013, Dan and I decided to pursue a civil case over what happened to Millie. We decided to keep this from the public because it was private to Dan and I as a family. To be honest, even very few family and friends know that we have been doing this, so this will be a little shock to some of those reading this.

Many people thought that we stopped everything after the Inquest but we didn’t as we wanted to feel as though we achieved a little bit of justice about what happened to Millie and to feel that we fought for her, we know as parents that you will no doubt understand this.

Unfortunately we will never know exactly what happened to Millie that day and as a parent that is completely heart breaking. What we do know is that we dropped of our perfectly healthy precious daughter at Ramillies Hall Nursery to be looked after, and never saw her alive again.

We have decided the time is right now to talk because the civil proceedings have been going on for many years behind closed doors now and unfortunately we are now heading towards a trial in the summer of this year.

As Millie’s parents we genuinely believe that more could have been done for Millie when she started to choke on her lunch and we will never stop believing that. We believe that Millie received minimal first aid treatment from the staff at the nursery and she was then held and given no CPR before the ambulance arrived.

Dan and I sadly watched CCTV footage of Millie being taken to the ambulance, footage that the jury at the Coroner’s Inquest didn’t get to see. On this CCTV, to Dan and I, Millie looks like a rag doll and we believe that before this point that Millie should have been receiving CPR as she had symptoms of not breathing normally at this point.

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Throughout the years that we have been pursuing the civil case, we have often been in positions where we have felt pressurised to drop Millie’s case and believe me, we have been so depressed about it all that at some stages we nearly have; but we pulled through and fought our own mental health illnesses to continue for our Millie.

We have continually felt as though the nursery had a lack of respect for us as a family, starting with the fact that they chose to keep the nursery open the day after Millie died there, as though it was business as usual and we have had to have the police involved to stop relatives of staff working there spreading rumours about Millie the day she passed away and us as a family.

This is one of the hardest things that we have ever had to write about in a long time because we never thought that we would talk about it but with the impending public trial- we feel it’s the right time for us.

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We would like to thank you all for your support to us since Millie passed away and we hope to continue to have your support going forward.

Joanne & Dan Thompson (Millie’s mummy & daddy) xxx

With thanks to Rozita Hussain Solicitors.

Read my Blog, It’s True, here

I have …I like to …

My name is Joanne

(I have anxiety)

I like to read

(I have PTSD)

I like to go to the gym

( I have OCD)

I like to play with my children

(I have depression)

I love the job I do

(I suffer from complex grief)

I like to cook

(I suffer from panic attacks)

I love listening to music

(I’m on anti-depressant medication)

I like to … well try anything really.

Do my mental health problems stop me from living my life? (Sometimes)

Do my mental health problems control me? (sometimes)

Do my mental health problems stop me from being a good mum?

The answer here should be no, but it doesn’t sometimes feel like that)

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Do my mental health problems stop me from being a good wife? (The answer here should be no, but it doesn’t sometimes feel like that)

The thing I’m getting at here is that your mental health problems should not dictate the rest of your life and how you live.

It has taken me many years to overcome a lot of issues that I have had since losing Millie, it has not been easy; yet I have overcome so many and still have a mountain to climb.

Yes, it stopped me from reading.

Yes, it stopped me from going to the gym.

Yes, it stopped me doing some of the stuff with my other children that I wanted to.

Yes, it stopped me from working.

Yes, it stopped me from cooking.

Yes, it stopped me from listening to music

But, I’ve started to do all this again …

Determination and strength will always allow you to one day continue with the things that you love.

Determination and strength come from within and it comes from talking about how you are feeling, talking makes you stronger.

Don’t let your mental health illnesses control who you want to be x

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#mentalhealthawareness

To read my last, Tears, Click Here

Tears

I know that being a parent is hard, it is really hard at times and I know that you can tear your hair out when you child does something you don’t like, so I’m not saying to be the perfect parent.

Even after losing Millie, we still have to tell Leo off and shout at him or we know that he could turn into a total brat. He does have me wrapped around his little finger but it doesn’t mean that he gets away with being naughty or hurting people (or the dog for the matter), we have to tell him off, we know that.

I don’t judge other parents because we all have our own parenting ways that work for us but yesterday I was disgusted and it hurt even more because we had just visited Millie’s resting place and had a full on spring clean there. (Check out Leo rocking his underpants, it was just too hot for him and he was slathered in sun cream – which of course he had a meltdown whilst I put it on him 😂).

Anyway, back to my disgust.

I witnessed a Mum shouting at a little girl yesterday in a supermarket who was probably around the age of what Millie should be now. The mum was absolutely swearing her head off at this poor child and telling her to “not to f***n come near her again today” and “to get out of her f***n way” … I was absolutely gobsmacked and even if I wasn’t a Mum who had lost a child, I am sure that I would have thought the same.

I really wanted to say something but this woman was so angry, she could have gone for me or taken it out on the child and I wouldn’t have wanted that. I was in such shock, I dropped the £20 I had in my hand (which I didn’t notice until I got to the till and I haven’t seen it for dust since) and had to walk away to get myself out of the way. I went to pay (with my debit card now) and left the shop, got in my car and cried.

I cried that I had just saw this poor girl be spoken to like this.

I cried because I had just come from visiting Millie at her resting place and I can’t put my arms around her anymore.

I cried because I was so sad that this mum didn’t know what she had and how special her daughter is and that she is privileged to be able to kiss her daughter goodnight.

I’m not having a preach here saying that you shouldn’t shout at your children or discipline them but this little girl, do you want to know what she had done?

Accidentally stood on her mum’s toe.

It was an accident, she didn’t deserve to have her mum shout and swear at her like that … just my thoughts xxx

Millie’s Trust are looking for people to join our team to do the Yorkshire Three Peaks in September (I will be doing it too 😀) contact us here to get more details or to register

Read my blog Four Weeks In here