Start of a New Year 

January is here again , Millie’s birthday month ( next Tuesday,12th) – it’s always hard this month in the run up to her birthday, l know how jittery I am already about it; especially now

January is here again , Millie’s birthday month ( next Tuesday,12th) – it’s always hard this month in the run up to her birthday, l know how jittery I am already about it; especially now we’ve just had Christmas and that was so emotional for us after not doing it since we lost Millie.

I’m looking forward to Leo’s 1st birthday in Feb because I feel like we’ll get a bit of an “emotional break”  for a good 6 months; normally a bit longer than that but this year we have the add on of Leo’s birthday on this end of the year and the period when Millie should be starting school – that’s how it is now for us, everything is guided around dates; believe me it’s not good for you mentally but I think to an extent most people are programmed like that to remember dates and times that are important to you whether you like it or not. Obviously Leo’s 1st birthday and when Millie should be starting school are 2 very big events for us and it’s gonna be sad. Of course, it’s not a complete “emotional break” – it’s just a period of feeling like a little bit of the weight has been lifted as we arent counting down to anything until the Autumn period again.

We’re unsure of what to do for Leo’s birthday yet (please feel free to throw some ideas our way), we want it to be special of course because we never got there with Millie, it’s another huge milestone for our little family again, one that I am sure will be recorded with many photographs.

Looking forward to having the weight lifted a little from us though over the summer months.

So, now we’ve all got Christmas and New Year over, let’s talk about Easter 😀😀😀 nah, I’m only kidding, I’ve just been highly amused yesterday evening when I paid a visit to our local supermarket and saw rows of Easter Eggs …. Seriously?? Lol

Easter next to discounted Christmas crackers, always makes me laugh.

So, most of you know that Leo doesn’t and won’t be going to nursery after what happened to Millie because it will just never be right for us. We are determined that Leo will go to some kind of pre-school further down the line as we don’t want to go from having him with us 24/7 to full time school – we know it won’t be good for us mentally. We are also more inclined to think that we will be able to do something like this because we have had help dealing with things like this from our friends Alison and Carl in New Zealand ( hi you two) … because unfortunately they have been through the same horrendous situation that we have too, they lost their gorgeous son Kory when he choked at nursery too; but their youngest son Charlie has now started to be away from his parents in a situation like this and I think, if they can do it, so we can we… we look up to them so much and gain so much from their experiences. It’s absolutely awful the way in which our families met, but they have been amazing for us.

So, I decided that I wanted to attend some kind of group where Leo could interact with other babies to improve his social skills, he’s fabulous around older children/ people but rarely gets the chance to interact with kiddies of his own age… And also because I need to get over my fears of Leo picking things up, putting them into his mouth and generally being more of an explorer … So I booked into a class, called Messy Monkeys … And this happened 😀

Then this …

And then this … 😀

It was absolutely fabulous.

I flinched everytime he picked up some dry rice.

I froze every time he put a paintbrush in his his mouth with paint on.

I felt faint when he picked up a cork and started to chew.

Sometimes, to strangers I must come across as rude, ignorant or disinterested when they are talking to me and I am watching Leo and they don’t know what happened us, I know full well that I zone completely out and tunnel vision Leo … but i promise, I am lovely really.

And the class, Leo loved it.

Leo loved it. Millie would have loved it too.

And that is what it is all about … Leo experiencing things that Millie would have done too.

I can’t stop him exploring and being adventurous and I wouldn’t want to.

So, anyway back to this class.

Leo was covered in paint and so was I. He had rice stuck to his legs and sticky glitter in his hair and he absolutely loved it and we can’t wait to go back next week. One of the best things about today’s class though, NO CLEANING UP! Leo had all this amazing fun and the lovely Messy Monkey girls did all the cleaning up afterwards! How fabulous is that! Leo also made and brought home his first piece of artwork – a 2016 calendar with his hand and footprint on (I know that it’s his hand and footprint anyway !) 😀

Leo and all the other babies even got to have their own little baths at the end in little red tubs with bubbles! What a wonderful end to the session.

I’d recommend this class to anyone if they are in your area! It’s great fun X

I wonder what other adventures we can get up to together?



MILLIELEOSMUM or Twitter @Joannet1985

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Millie & Leo’s grandma is hosting a raffle around Millie’s Birthday (next week) in the school she works in. If you are a business and can donate a product or voucher to this event please do get in touch by emailing or PM us on Facebook or Twitter. Beauty Vouchers, restaurant vouchers, actual products from businesses would be very welcome. Thanks Peeps


0 thoughts on “Start of a New Year 

  1. Dates; people tell me all the time to forget them, the dates my mum went into hospital, when she died when my died was killed by a young driver and so on and so on but some dates always stick in your mind even if you don’t deliberately them.
    You are doing such an amazing job with Millie’s trust and with your adorable little boy Leo, I’m sure Millie will be with you on every adventure you have together. Xxx

    1. Hi Sharon, I’m so sorry to hear about your mum. You can’t can you, you just can’t get those dates to disappear no matter how hard you try x Big hugs x

  2. Check you two out with the messy play!! Amazing…well done doesn’t even cover it. You are facing those fears head on and as a result Leo’s life is all the fuller and all the richer. Take it a week at a time. Some weeks it might be too much and that’s fine too, it doesn’t have to be all or nothing. You are a wonderful mummy and Leo & Millie are both lucky to have you. I’m sure that Millie was whispering in Leo’s ear “Ooh look at that big fat paintbrush with all the tasty, gloopy red paint on it” with that mischievous little smile on her face.💖

  3. How about a cake smash for his 1st birthday . We done it for my youngest and she loved it and it’s lovely to look back on the pictures . Looks like he had great fun xxc

  4. Fantastic Jo, well and Leo. Good on you for going and enriching his life even more. People can say dates are just dates, but that is so not true. Maybe those dates might become more manageable as time goes on. Why forget? No you shouldn’t just to please other people. Keep the news coming xx

  5. Happy new year to your littel family Well done jo & little leo looks like you had a fantastic time 🙂 ino what you mean by dates i to had to deal with it been my angels 12th bithday resently good luck with what you plan for you dan & littel leo for his birthday xxxx

  6. Love reading your blogs joanne, wow leos coming on isnt he, those pictures are gorgeous hes such a cutie, hope your all well, love always vicky xxx

  7. My youngest boy Freddie is the same age as Millie, he’ll turn 4 on Sunday (10th) and I am so sorry for your loss.
    Talking about dates, I lost my brother on 28th March 2015 and I’ve been surprised at how much dates now affect me…his birthday, MY birthday (I missed that text that read “Happy Birthday Sis so much), Christmas (how can a bauble with a name on it on the tree and a candle saying “brother” make you feel better? It doesn’t), New Years Eve / Day and then on 14th March will be the anniversary of when he was taken into hospital…that phone call…driving for 1,5 hours to get to him and seeing him on life support that he never came off. I am in pain emotionally every day so I dare not even think about your pain…but I think you’re doing an amazing job! xx

    1. Hi. Thank you for asking. I’ve just announced that I’m pregnant and I’ve been very ill for the past few months xxx I’ll be posting more now as I’m starting to feel a little better x

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